Dr. Suruchi Goyal Agarwal, Consultant in Paediatrics and Paediatric Endocrinology at Columbia Asia Hospital, Whitefield, Bangalore

  • Who is a perfect parent?
  • Does a perfect parent exist?
  • Am I a perfect parent?
  • Are you a perfect parent?
  • Do you have to be a perfect parent to be a good one?
  • Who decides my perfection?

The constant push to become the perfect parent is inadvertently putting immense pressure on children to become ‘perfect children’: the one who is good at music, dance, art, academics, sports and many more. Their success is the measure of parental perfection. The constant comparison of children and the push to be better than the other leading to unhealthy competition. Who has set this measure? It’s still a mystery!

Rather than getting into the race of being perfect, parents must address the bigger picture: guiding, nurturing and nudging children in the right direction whilst at the same time allowing then to become fiercely independent. Hence, it’s important to:

  • To guide children and introduce them to various opportunities and allow them to choose.
  • Let them learn through your experiences and stories.
  • Let them understand and deal with failure whilst standing behind them and getting them through it.
  • Let them make decisions starting from the smallest things and build up to bigger ones.
  • Let them be the best at what they want and not what the parent wants.
  • Let them learn to boldly express themselves and be free to speak their minds.
  • Let them know that ‘I will always be proud of you’!

That’s what a child wants!

And when you do that – it’s perfectly good!

 

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